I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
