question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
how drunk are you?
Several
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
