whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
