Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize