Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
