you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
