Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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