Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
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