Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
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