You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize