Your face is a jimmy john
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
