No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize