As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
