Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
