I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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