is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
