Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
