Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
