quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Randomize
