i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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