I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Success! We fucked roommates!
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
