Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
