HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
