so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
