Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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