This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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