white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
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