he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
