Already got asked if we're dating
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
