Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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