I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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