so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
it's great music for shaving your balls
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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