Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Randomize
