How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
