Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Randomize
