we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
