I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I am mentally ready for anal.
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