Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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