I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
