Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
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