chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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