Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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