I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
We named our party play list daddy issues
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
