Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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