You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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