xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
