hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize