Come see our sink grown plant.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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