Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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