why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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